The Accidental Mentor: Why the Best Discipleship Doesn’t Look Like a Program

Think back to mentors you’ve had in your life. Did they know they were mentors? Did they have an intentional plan for the process? Did they understand the impact they were having? 

My experience has been that if you were fortunate enough to have a mentor in your life, they likely didn’t even realize they were one. They were just sharing their life with you.

Jesus’ powerful strategy for changing the world was—and is—this kind of everyday discipleship. One-on-one, life-on-life mentoring is the primary way the Gospel spreads to the next generation. Yet, true, intentional and personal discipleship is often what is most lacking in the church today.

We see this need at every stage of life. Recently, my son had the opportunity to share a short message with a group of grade 8 graduates. I was delighted to hear him challenge them about the community they choose to build as they head into high school.

He told them, “Who you surround yourself with in the next four years of your life is going to have such a HUGE impact on the rest of your life after that.”

As he kept speaking, he laid out some core principles of mentoring—the very same principles we teach church leaders across the country. He told those graduates that they need people in their lives who:

• “Have lived through a lot of the challenges and decisions you are going to face.”
• “Are people that you can go to with your problems… someone that you can trust.”
• “Help point you towards Jesus in everything. Through your highs and your lows… God uses mentors to help point us towards being faithful to him.”

I might be biased, but I think he showed incredible wisdom. At its core, mentoring isn’t a complex program; it is simply sharing the Gospel and our lives together. As Paul writes in 1 Thessalonians 2:8: 

“Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.”

That is exactly what we do at FamilyLife Canada (a ministry of Power to Change). We partner with local churches to help them move past programs and build a real culture of mentoring, community, and discipleship for marriages and families…

…so that the world may know Jesus and experience His power. 🌎

Here are 8 qualities of a good mentor:

• Personally mature
• Relational
• Caring
• Good listeners
• Servant hearted
• Authentic and honest
• Willing to be vulnerable
• Growing

You can learn more about our Marriage Mentoring Initiative and training here. We want to see more of this life-on-life discipleship happen in communities across Canada.

If a specific mentor came to mind while reading this, consider sending them a quick text today to thank them. It might be the exact encouragement they need to keep investing in others.