StevenBourque.com

Wins and Losses (as a Parent)

30 05 2013

Some honest reality checks for the difficulties of parenting. I can identify. Can you?

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Tags: kids, losses, wins
Categories : Children's Ministry, Family, Parenting

I’m sure you can tell many of your own personal stories to your children. They will love hearing about them! Don’t neglect to pass on your journey to the next generation. They will benefit from your experience and the lessons you learned from it. Here’s one of my stories and a simple lesson you can teach your children.

from Wikipedia

One night a few years ago, there was some sickness going around. I got it. I started feeling a little queasy before bed. In the middle of the night, I woke up and was like, “Oh boy, here it is.” So I went downstairs knowing that I was going to throw up, but trying to think of anyway I could avoid it. You know, crackers and stuff. But nope, nothing was going to work. My body needed to throw up!

So it happened. Not cool, but something didn’t look right. What came out was kind of dark. So I was trying to figure out if I should go to the hospital or not. Cause I felt siiiick! I ended up going to the doctor and he said it’s probably just a virus. I came back home, but didn’t feel any better.

Later that morning, I threw up again. It was dark again. I’m thinking, “Now I know I threw up blood.” Ya gross right? So I went back to the hospital. I knew something wasn’t right, but there was NOTHING…I…COULD…DO! My wife came along with me and she said I looked white. I waited at emerge for somebody, ANYBODY to help me. I didn’t know what was going to happen, but I knew the doctors could help me. I trusted that they knew what to do and would take care of my problem.

I ended up waiting awhile and discovered that something had gone wrong inside my body. When I threw up, the doctor told me that I tore something inside me and they had to go inside and have a look. He said it was called a Mallory Weiss tear and sometimes happens with young, strong, powerful, good looking and amazing young men. Okay, okay that’s not all true, but he did say young and strong.

So they prepared me for an operation. They put me to sleep, for which I was SO thankful! Then they stuck a tube down my throat with a camera. They found a tear, then they used water to wash it away and clean me up inside. They couldn’t use stitches or anything, but I think the medicine they gave me helped to heal my wound.

I had to recover for awhile. The doctor said later that I had lost a lot of blood and was close to needing a blood transfusion, which just means I would need to get blood put into me. I’ll tell you what, I am SOO thankful for doctors and hospitals!!!

After that experience, I hate throwing up even more. I bet you hate throwing up too. Isn’t it so good to know that when we have problems with our bodies, we can go to hospitals and have doctors fix us up?

You could say this to your children: “We have a more serious problem than our bodies getting sick, injured and even dying! There is nothing we can do about this problem on our own. We need something far better than doctors. We need Doctor Jesus!”

[Jesus] told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor–sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.” -Mark 2:17

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Tags: death, doctor, health, Jesus, Mallory Weiss tear, problem, righteous, sickness, sin, sinners, story
Categories : Children's Ministry, Family, Parenting

Thought Beasts: A Parable

30 04 2013

God spoke to Cain: “Why this tantrum? Why the sulking? If you do well, won’t you be accepted? And if you don’t do well, sin is lying in wait for you, ready to pounce; it’s out to get you, you’ve got to master it.” Genesis 4:7

Our children have many thoughts and feelings that lead to many words and actions. Some beneficial and others…well not so much. They don’t know how to master them. Will you help them learn to control their thoughts so they can use them for good in this world? Will you help them avoid destructive choices? Here’s a story you can tell them!

Once there were two lads preparing to set off on their own and build their first home. The first lad was named Gumble. The second was named Victor. They had their tools and materials to begin setting up to build. They each entered the same vast forest filled with stunning flowers, towering trees, cute animals and…something else. Not long after, there appeared two tiny creatures. They were ugly little beasts. One was drawn toward Gumble and the other was drawn toward Victor.

One rainy day, as Gumble was working on his home, he began to think about the difficulty and dreariness of his work. His beast crept up and latched onto him without him even realizing it. Gumble began to…grumble. He was unhappy about being wet and about having to work in the cold. He was annoyed because of the flies and also because…three little neighbouring pigs and a wolf were being so noisy!

That same day, as Victor was working on his home, he was on the lookout for anything that might slow him down. Victor’s beast drew near, but he was ready. He had listened to the lore and legends about these beasts. One thing he learned about them was that they were the kind of beasts that feed on worthless thoughts. So he equipped himself with thoughts about how happy he’d be to complete his home deep in these beautiful woods.

The beast crept slowly up through the grass toward Victor. He snarled. His brow was furrowed. His teeth and claws were bared. He silently made his way close to Victor. Then…he pounced! …and bounced. You see, though the beast tried to latch on to Victor, it was unable. These beasts cannot cling to worthy thoughts only worthless thoughts. Now Victor had to work in the rain and the mud, with flies, spiders and pigs just like Gumble. But Victor knew how to be…victorious over the beasts. He thought about having a family in his new home and about the ways it could be decorated and the home theatre he would enjoy with ultra bass, crystal clear sound, HD vivid images and even a remote control, where he could watch the Toronto Maple Leafs beat the Detroit Red Wings.

As the days went by, Victor completed his home and lived happily ever after. However, Gumble’s worthless thoughts began to multiply. He thought about his blisters, the searing heat, splinters and even how his sister broke his favourite toy jack-in-the-box back in kindergarten. Now Gumble didn’t pay attention to beast lore and what he didn’t know was that these beasts grow and cannot be seen while latched to a host filled with worthless thoughts. And as beasts grow, worthless thoughts turn to quibbles, quibbles become grumpiness, grumpiness morphs into angst and angst breeds a full-blown case of the heebie-jeebies! To this very day, Gumble’s house lays in an unfinished heap.

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Tags: anger, beast, Cain, complain, emotions, feelings, God, grumble, kids, parable, perspective, story, thoughts, victory, work
Categories : Children's Ministry, Family

Book Review: The Christian Parenting Handbook!

29 04 2013

I’ve been privileged to get a preview of this brand new book by Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, known for great parenting books based on Biblical and heart-based approaches. Their website is http://www.biblicalparenting.org. You can pre-order the new book anywhere, but here is a link to it at the Canadian Amazon site. Below is my review.

When Joanne and Scott say in the introduction, “You’re holding a book of ideas,” they aren’t kidding! If you’re looking for a treasure trove of parenting ideas that goes beyond clever quips and coy research to truly heart transformational truth, you’re going to want to pick up this book. As the title says, it’s a handbook. You’ll want it close by for quick reference relevant to almost any situation or any question you’ll face as a parent.

As a parent, you’re also looking for more than a plethora of ideas, you’re also looking for an overarching way of thinking that breathes vitality into your family life. Scott and Joanne provide the Biblical foundations that are essential for looking beyond the parenting pressures of day-to-day life and into eternally valuable insights that will sustain and energize your journey.

The authors don’t sugar coat their principles or try to make parenting seem easy. They acknowledge the difficulties, but provide more than adequate inspiration to accompany many truths that will equip parents well. They often suggest things that may take a little more work on the surface, but will greatly improve the results and increase the satisfaction and sense of purpose along the way. I love their emphasis on training, which I like to call rhythm, and their solid understanding of the Bible’s use of the word “discipline.” Here’s a quote:

“The word discipline used in the Old Testament is translated from the Hebrew word chanak. It means “to train.””

Oftentimes, we as parents feel we’re constantly in the corrective mode and trying to “get kids to behave.” This book offers a refreshing approach that focuses on building relationships, the joy of great character, building on strengths and a life of wisdom leading to success.

I feel a sigh of relief coming on and see the sun of hope rising on the horizon!

This book is super-charged with practical and easy to find advice and, more importantly, it is infused with a Christ-focused way of thinking about the parenting journey. It is a proactive versus reactive approach that will empower you to be a great parent. You’re going to want this as your go-to book in your parenting library!